Tuesday, May 02, 2006

Today, your kind secret correspondent brings you a special feature on not the elections but on 11 personalities that have had the unfortunate pleasure of spending two days with me. We present to you some of their darkest (literally) secrets and information.

First up we have...

Name: Goh "hihi" Meiting
Background: The smallest and most powerful odacian
Darkest secret: Rumoured to be in love with...ODAC! As the saying goes, do not judge a book by its cover and thus do not judge a meiting by her size. Is incredibly strong and can haul a whole two man kayak during rescues and insists on not getting help to board her kayak after capsizing. Is incredibly patient with planes that fly past and likes to stand on chairs so as to make others look shorter. Here we see her after scrumptuous dinner on saturday.

Name: Ang "tai tai" Yishan
Background: Loves pink
Darkest secret: Fear her as she unloads her whole armada of moisturiser, face cream, spa gel and conditioner. Quite poor thing being extremely sunburnt after two days in the sun and is now redder (and hotter ahem) than chilli. We wish her a speedy recovery.

Name: Gerard "hysterical laughter" Lim Dao Ming
Background: Extremely clear headed (literally)
Darkest secret: Has the ability to sleep standing up and sleep without clothes on, i meant shirt only. He is applauded for being able to survive two days of kayaking with Gina. Here we see him after a treatment at yun nam hair care.

Name: James "QM" Lee
Background: only guy in exco whose name doesn't start with G
Darkest secret: Just see him in school and you'll realise what the sun has kindly done to his face. It's like free natural facial exfoliation treatment lor. Eats anything and everything and has a shithole for a stomach. Here we see him right after kayaking, sustaining 10th degree burns.

Name: Marie "Secretary-General" Lim
Background: Do not be deceived by her
Darkest secrets: Seemingly innocent, our beloved secretary is anything but that. Beneath that facade is a girl who employs pokes and her ultimate pouting skills will make any guygirldogcat crumble to their knees and surrender. Though she has a body of cotton, she has a mind of steel and we salute her for pressing through the whole expedition even though she was incredibly shagged to the core, at times she was truly sleepyhead101. Here we see her in her most appetising form.

Name: Kelly "runs-like-siao" Ng
Background: characteristic green hairband
Darkest secrets: Emerged from the expedition as red as a crab her msn nick declares "Kelly is HOT" but we so think otherwise. Be warned, don't offend her or you will get owned by her perennial stressed and buay song face. Here we see her during lectures giving me her usual dirty look.

Name: Gina "Gila" Ng
Background: Hazard to mankind
Darkest secrets: Should be kept away from milo at all times, or any other sweet substance for that matter. Can get dangerously high and start singing uncontrollably from "When you say nothing at all" to raffles cheers. Is rumoured to have pee-ed in the hatch compartment of her kayak. Here we do everyone a favour by reminding them to mind their sanity when near her.

Name: Gerald "rudolph" Tay
Background: Is incredibly blessed with the same name as me
Darkest secrets: Today, he's a changed man. The pic shows u the before(right) and after(left) effects of two days out at sea. By some amazing piece of luck, his nose got burnt like a dunno wad and now he looks like rudolph. Rumour has it that he was visibly (literally) traumatised for some unknown reason. Ladies and gentlemen, pls take the time to tease him abt his nose.

Name: Petrina "damn manly" Leo
Background: The darkest person in exco
Darkest secrets: very very x10^99 ownage Training IC. She is muchly loved for brining the aloe vera gel that gerald tay digs like its some gold and that which mr shah wanted to eat. And gerard has incured the wrath of this lady by whacking her on her sunburnt legs. He has, at last check, ran away to somewhere in indonesia for fear of this fatal female.

Name: Grace "stealthy" Lum
Background: our beloved treasurer
Darkest secrets: Is already quite dark to begin with, she is extremely stealthy and silent. Do not be fooled by her unassuming ways, just give her a dancer and she can overtake even the pointer. Also the first to KO on saturday night and was sound asleep in the bunk before we even lay our heads to rest.